One Day I woke up Different….

I’m not sure exactly the day that happened, maybe it was in January sometime, but I woke up one day and felt different. Felt as though all of the life I had lived was worth every pain and trial. I realized that only by giving my whole heart to God will my life ever get on the right track.

Maybe deciding that I can’t put myself and my life in another humans hands? Understanding that without the relationship I’m building with my God, my life will continue to be out of whack. I think I’ve spent too much time trying to make everyone else happy and putting my own happiness on the back burner. Thinking if I was with someone that my loneliness would go away. But, in actuality the ones I gave my heart too made me feel even more lonely.

My relationship with God is on the right track. My life is so blessed. I have people in my life that make my days happier, make my life better. I’ve met a really nice MAN. He treats me like the queen God says I am. Not sure where things will go because it’s all new but I’m leaving it in His hands. I’m taking the old self out of it and letting God design it the way He sees. I’m Happy! I know, if for whatever reason, things don’t work with him, then it is because God wasn’t in it.

Thank you Father for always showing me your love and grace over my life. For giving me great family and friends that are there for me every day. For blessing me daily. For forgiving me daily. For knowing that I fail you everyday but that you love me regardless because you know none of us are perfect. For the past trials and pains I had to live through, to be able to stand strong with You now. I’m grateful for so much, including this amazing man you’ve placed in my life. I pray your hand over this relationship. Guide it for your glory! Bring our hearts closer to you. ❤

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New You

Embrace what God is doing in your life. It may be hard to understand where He’s taking you. May be hard to release the old and come into the new, but remember, God’s got you! He will never leave you! He will not let you wander in the desert Alone! He’s always beside you, even when you think He’s not. I’ve been there, I’m still there! He’s ever changing me and always showing me the New! Trust in Him! Trust in your journey! ❤

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Kindness Matters

“Kindness holds the door open for an elderly person leaving the grocery store. Unusual kindness willingly carries their groceries all the way to their car, puts them in the trunk and sends them on their way with a, “It was my pleasure,” when they’re thanked.

Kindness is smiling at the maxed-out mom of two young kids pitching a royal fit in the department store toy aisle, rather than stone-faced silently judging her for her apparent lack of parenting skills. Unusual kindness recognizes that all children misbehave and this stressed-out mama is woefully outnumbered. So you tell her to hang in there. That she is doing an important job. And maybe you slip her a 10 dollar bill and tell her to buy herself a large latte. She’s gonna need to keep her energy up.

Kindness whispers a prayer for your just-moved-in-from-six-states-away neighbor facing life outside of work time all alone. Unusual kindness invites him to your house for a weekend supper, folds him in to your family’s ordinary life and asks him questions as you seek to get to know him better.

Scatter some unusual kindness today. When you do, you’ll make someone’s day — and yours!”- Karen Ehman

(Courtesy of: Proverbs 31)

Kindness…..such a small thing but so hard to show sometimes. I’m the first to admit I could be a lot kinder to that mother having a melt down with screaming kids or to that new neighbor. I think we get so caught up in “life”, we forget to extend a reaching hand to someone who may need it more than we know.

I’m trying to see people with more love and kindness. Asking God to give me the eyes and heart that He has for people. To give more mercy and grace. To love with a non-judgemental heart. To be more humble. To understand that sometimes you could actually be the person that speaks life into someone when they are at the end of their rope.

Take time to be kind today. To give a hug to someone. To pray with someone. To just give someone a “how ya doin”. It could actually be the difference between life or death for someone.

Thank you Lord for extending love, grace, mercy and kindness to us, when we usually never deserve it. Cover us with the same heart as you to speak those things over someone who may need to see your light. Grant us the right words to speak to a hurting soul. Bless each life we come in contact with. Help us to be kind and merciful to those who need to see You in us! Thank you Father for always forgiving and loving us. ❤

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Fear can be Gripping

“Satan wants us to be afraid.

I’m not talking about the healthy kind of fear that keeps us safe. No, I’m referring to that horrible kind of fear that whispers worst-case scenarios.

While we’re distracted with fear, the enemy pickpockets our purpose, cripples our courage, dismantles our dreams and blinds us to the beauty of the Lord’s great plans.

Are you struggling with fear in any area of your life right now? Maybe there’s a relationship causing anxiety. Or a problem you’re facing where there seems to be no solution.

Stop right now and speak the name of Jesus. Proclaiming His name brings power, protection and perspective that crushes fear. It is the name above every other.”

(Courtesy of Lysa TerKeurst)

Wow, do I so get this. Fear gripped my life for so many years that I feel like sometimes I missed out on so much. I’m thankful God has been really healing this in my heart and soul over the past few months.

Of course, we always have a tinge of fear in our lives but not to the point that it controls you like I did and I’m sure a lot of others have. I’m sure I’m not alone in this.

I had an instance of it popping up last night….very small and it was gone after a quick phone call. I think when you’ve been through such traumatic events in your life it is second nature, at some degree, to let fear exist. But, it doesn’t have to control you.

God has really taught me to just rest in Him. Be still and know that no matter what ever happens, He has me! He carries the control and the healing. He will give us what we need, in Him, to rest in the middle of the chaos. To rest knowing He will be there to hold you up, to carry you through that moment.

Thank you Father for healing me. For showing me your much bigger than fear. That you control my destination. You have the control over this life and that no matter what we may face, to rest in the assurance that You, our Healer, will take care of us. You are so good to us. Thank you for this beautiful life you are investing in and changing my heart for the good. For helping me rest in you! I know no matter what I face, you will be there! Right there!

Isaiah 41:10 “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous hand.”

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Choices

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths—Proverbs 3:5-6”

“Remember the rhythm of being with Me. Remember the rhythm of rest as well as work. I’ve said this before: I am with you now, but living this life purely, resolutely, does take effort. It takes commitment and focus and resolve to stand fast with Me. It takes a heart stripped away of all burdens, all distractions. Everything in this world attempts to distract you from Me. But I give you what you need so you can do the things I’ve prepared for you to do. But you have to believe Me. And you have to live believing Me, with every action you take.

But maybe I am not what you are pursuing. What is it you are pursuing? What is it you are chasing? What is it you desire? What is it you spend most of your days thinking about, longing for? What is it you worry about, wonder about? What are you working toward, leaning toward? What do you hope to accomplish? What do you hope, more than anything, this life brings you?

Be intentional, my love, about the choices you make. You are designed to make choices alongside Me, with my guidance, so you are never alone. But the times you do feel alone are opportunities to probe your heart, considering what drives it, what consumes it, what drains it. You are meant to have a pure heart, and anything in it distracting you from living purely, with intention and good purpose toward my good plans for you, needs to be laid down. Give Me your heart again, my love. Don’t wrestle with that burden on your own.

So ask for more faith, and I will give it. So ask for more courage, and you will feel Me close. But that isn’t enough. Try it out now, the faith and courage I give you. Try out the presence of Me within you being enough for you, and do the things I’ve created you to do. I will purify your heart. I will keep you and strengthen you and carry you. But you won’t know I’m doing this unless you take some risks, trusting me more than anything, anything!

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I Believe in Love

“I still believe in love. I still believe that in spite of your painful past, you can still meet someone tomorrow who would love to build a beautiful future with you. I still believe there is someone out there tailor made to love you how you deserve to be loved. I still believe that you can go from being in a relationship that feels like a nightmare, to being in love with someone who feels like a dream come true. I still believe that someone can still see the best in you, even when you only see the worst. I still believe that you can wake up with joy in your heart and peace in your spirit. I still believe that you can meet someone who will never leave your side during a difficult time. I still believe that you can meet someone who wants to add value to your life. I still believe that you can meet someone who wants to bring your smile back and make you laugh again. I still believe that you can still fall in love…”

(Courtesy of: IG@woodtheinspiration)

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Do you still believe in Love? Have you been hurt so many times that it’s hard to believe in Love? Well, trust me, I get it!

I definitely believe love is out there to be found. I think when you put it in God’s hands, it will happen. But, I think both parties have to be ready. You may already be but maybe God is not totally finished with him. Or vice versa!

I never want to give up on love or give up on the fact that the special guy I’m destined to be with is out there. I think it’s sad to see people give up. Give up on never finding that person. I understand it though. I’ve given up on several occasions but I never gave up on love itself. I’ve thought “maybe he’s just not out there”. I know in my heart that I was made to be a wife. That God promised me that one day I would be a wife again but I have to learn a lot before.

I’m learning to be that Ephesians woman. To give of myself in a way I never would have in my first marriage. To learn that God has to be first before that man can be. God has to be the center of our relationship or it’ll never work. We have to learn to value each other the way God values us. There are so many things that have to be taught from God before we can truly be the best in our marriages.

I’m learning and taking notes. I want to be a wife again one day, but till then, I’ll be the best single woman after God’s own heart that I can be. Let Him teach me how to be a good wife and partner. I look forward to that day! That beautiful day, that I get to spend my life with the man He chose for me! ❤

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Friends / Family

I have to be completely honest, I have some of the greatest friends and family a girl could ask for. I know I am going off the mark here a little but I just wanted those people that are the closet to me to know just how much I appreciate them.

My girlfriend of over 30 years has been a godsend to me. She has inspired me in my walk with God and also been that person that has held me up when there were times I wanted to give up. We have had our differences but in the grand scheme of it all, we will always have a bond that no one could ever break. I have friends that I will forever be grateful for at each step of my life. My girlfriend that stood by me after Jeff’s death and was unfortunately the one who had to give me the bad news about him. That friendship has been blessed by good times and bad times. She will forever be a part of who I am and what has shaped me. Another who I’ve known for over 20 years and her children were always like my children. I love that family like my own. I can honestly say those 3 ladies have been the back bone to my existence for some 30 or more years.

My family, what can I say, I have the best family a girl could ask for. My sister and I have not always been close but I’m thankful that we are now. My mom, well she is the best mom I know. I’m sure we all say that about our mothers but she has been there for me through some tough times. She was also the kind of southern mama that would snatch you up in a hot minute….lol (she’s done it a few times). I had 2 great Aunts, that have passed on into Heaven, that were some of the sweetest women I knew. They played a huge roll in raising my sister and I. I was blessed with some great women in my life. Probably a lot of the reason why I have become such a strong woman, those ladies and God of course.

He knew exactly the kind of family and friends I would need in my life. A mother who didn’t always have it all together but that loved us and took care of us best she knew how. Two wonderful Great Aunts that were strong and yet, very gentle and loving! A sister who has been to the trenches and back on several occasions with me. Friends that have stood by me in good times and tough as hell times. Some of those times I wasn’t sure I would make it to the other side but they did it with lots of grace and mercy!

I am telling you guys this because I am so fortunate and blessed to have the life I have and the family and friends that I have. I know I left out some of my family but I can tell you they have all been a blessing in one way or the other to me. Some of them are no longer with us but I am looking forward to seeing them again one beautiful day. God has been so good to me. There have been days I thought I could not get up and take one step out of the house, but He has surely sent people into my life that have helped me see I could do just about anything I set my mind too.

Thank you Father for these wonderful people and for the people I have yet to meet. We know you design the right people each of us will need in this life and we could never thank you enough for those people. You are a good Daddy!!! You are the Daddy I always needed and never had! I am so blessed to be walking in this life, continuing to strengthen my relationship with you! Thank you for never giving up on me, when I gave up on myself quite a few times. You always held me tighter in those times, I could feel it! I am beyond blessed! ❤

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King of the World

“I tried to fit you in the walls inside my mind
I try to keep you safely in between the lines
I try to put you in the box that I’ve designed
I try to pull you down so we are eye to eye

When did I forget that you’ve always been the king of the world?
I try to take life back right out of the hands of the king of the world
How could I make you so small
When you’re the one who holds it all

When did I forget that you’ve always been the king of the world?
Just a whisper of your voice can tame the seas
So who am I to try to take the lead
Still I run ahead and think I’m strong enough
When you’re the one who made me from the dust

When did I forget that you’ve always been the king of the world?
I try to take life back right out of the hands of the king of the world
How could I make you so small
When you’re the one who holds it all

When did I forget that you’ve always been the king of the world?

Oh, you set it all in motion
Every single moment
You brought it all to me
And you’re holding on to me

When did I forget that you’ve always been the king of the world?
I try to take life back right out of the hands of the king of the world
How could I make you so small
When you’re the one who holds it all

When did I forget you’ve always been the king of the world?
You will always be the king of the world”

 

(Natalie Grant – King of the World)

 

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This song sings to my soul! Whenever I hear it on the radio, I immediately turn it up wide open. It’s how I feel I’ve spent most of the early part of my relationship with God, put Him in a neat tiny box. Like I honestly thought that if I did that and pulled Him out when I needed him, life would be grand!! Wow, was I mistaken on that one. Trying to constantly take my life and fix it. Well, that didn’t work. I think it is why this song speaks to me so much. It’s about me, my relationship with God, my life.

God can not be contained in a box and no matter how hard you try to arrange your life the way YOU think it should be, it’ll never work. Allow Him the control, sit back and have faith that He knows you better than you know you! Trust me, you can’t control Him!

Thank you Father for taking my life and arranging it according to Your will. I don’t want to confine you in a box. I want you to have total control of my life. The good, the bad and the ugly! I am not strong enough to do what you desire for me! You are who makes me strong!

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